Youth at the Crossroad

What is a cross road?

A crossroad is point in your life when you have to make an important decision. It means to be presented with two or more options of which you have to choose one. All things being equal, when a child is born the parents are the ones that make a decision every time they come to a cross road, but there comes a time when little by little the child starts to choose for himself and finally it reaches a point where the child is solely in charge of every decision they make whether good or bad.

     A Crossroad is a double edged sword to a youth because it is a sensitive period where each decision made can completely change your life. This means that you can always find your way back to the right path because of the many opportunities that come your way but you can Also at the same time spiral to the wrong path in seconds.

The 3 Ps at the crossroad

   Before going further, let’s talk about what happens at the crossroad. Many times we find ourselves at a crossroad, and we do not know what to do, what to lookout for and what decision to make. There  are three element that are always present at every crossroad, this means that at every point where you have to make a decision there will always be these three elements that will aid you to make a decision. And these three elements are;

1. People
2. Past experiences
3. Projection

People

At every crossroad there must be “people”.  This is further divided to two categories; the people behind each path or the people pointing to each path. Let me explain better by giving two illustrations. The first one is a relatable it is about choosing between friends or two friend groups or even choosing a life partner. So here you see that the two or more decisions each point to different people. The person or the group of persons that you choose goes a long way to shaping how your life will look like. Let’s give an example imagine that you want to choose a life partner and you have two or more options.

The first option may be one person who you are physically attracted to basically your type or spec but who may end up cheating on you later, the second one may be a confident and rich man but may end up being abusive and the third one may be average or have all or non of these qualities but Is the one that God has planned for you. Now bear in mind that you do not know that the first one is going to cheat or the second one is going to be abusive however, who you choose among these three options presented will completely change the outcome of your life.

The second illustration is that you are about to enter the university or  half way through secondary school and it’s time to decide on your future career, at this point you will find these set of people around you; your parents, your teachers, your friends, your pastor, anyone in the capacity to give you advise and even yourself. And most times these people all point to different paths each of them will suggest the best path to take and you will have to choose which one of them you follow.

Who you meet at the crossroad can help you in making your decisions. God has put people strategically at every point where we have to make decisions; He has put destiny helpers and people that are there to guide us which is in the place of mentorship. So be careful anytime you’re about to make a decision or when you find yourself at the crossroad, lookout for those that God have sent to you.

Past Experiences

   The second thing you see at the cross road is your past experiences, the result of all the decisions that has made you the person you are, I also like to call this element the present. They say experience is the best teacher. I agree with that quote only to the extent that as humans there are some things we refuse to learn unless experience teaches us personally. For example in secondary school you decided to follow bad company as opposed to following those that were serious with their books as your parents advised you and now you have failed your WASSCE and jamb and you finally understand.

But now you have learnt your lesson and now you are in university you see a similar situation where you have to choose between the similar friends you had in secondary school or people are serious minded. Your past experience will tell you that this is a familiar situation and you should choose the latter. However, this does not always mean that your past experience is always right. Most times our experience has shaped our mindsets, what we believe and our understanding of life so that when we are presented with a decision to make we end up using a flawed mindset to make a decision. The bible in proverb 3:5-6 says “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”[NIV] Your experience in life can never be all there is to life.

Projection

   The third element is projection.  Projection is seeing the possible results of the decisions. It is simply asking your self, if I make this this decision what is the probable result? But the decisions we have to make in life are complex and filled with many variables and we may not be able to see far enough to where God wants to bring us to or what He is trying to shield is from.

The tricky thing about the 3 Ps is how little we see and know as humans. The 3Ps things are majorly deduced from man’s perspective and so we cannot judge accurately when we can’t see the full picture. The secret is the eyes and heart of God. Seeing through the eyes of God enables you to know the spirit behind each “people”, it will enable you to see and understand the lessons behind each experience and thereby enabling you to see a possibility you never imagined. Meanwhile knowing the heart of God enables you to know what God wants for you at each moment and this cannot be overemphasized, you can have two decisions to make and both decisions may be “right” but only one can be the will of God for you at that time. So it is important for you to know the heart of God for you at that particular moment, the heart of God for the world and how you play a role in it. By seeing through the eyes of God you have the confidence that you are going in the right direction.

What to do at the crossroad?

Sometimes we find ourselves in a crossroad and honestly and realistically speaking we are lost of what you do we don’t know which choice to make and we don’t know if the decision that we want to make is right. When you are at the crossroad, there are several things that you need to keep in mind as you make that any decision.

1. That each path leads to two different outcomes and with each decision comes its consequence. To every action there is a reaction and to every decision there is a consequence, so whether good or bad there has to be a result for every decision made. If we look at 1kings 12 we see the story of king Rehoboam, the son of Solomon who was the reigning king of Israel at that time. The people of Israel were taxed with heavy labour which King Solomon imposed on them.The people of Israel had come to meet king Rehoboam and asked him to lighten their burden. He in turn asked for three days to consult the elders and his peer group and make a decision. The elders advised him to lighten the load and his peer group advised him to even put more hardship to show that he was bigger than his father. At the end of the day he chose the latter and the consequence of that was the division of Israel.

2. Your decisions have a lasting effect on your life. Each decision you make has the ability to change the course of your life. Sometimes we trivialize the decisions that we make without knowing the huge impact that decision is going to make in our lives.  Let’s look at the life of Daniel. Daniel was presented with the choice of either eating of the King’s portion or abstaining from the kings portion, in fact the option of abstaining from the kings portion was not even an option at all because the king had already pre arranged the food that the chosen people were supposed to eat, and Daniel was only allowed to eat vegetables because he had found favor in the size of the commanders. The truth is that if many of us were presented with this same Dilemma most of us will choose to eat of the king’s portion in a heartbeat why? because it was more convenient who would not like to enjoy good food also they were far from home in a strange land and every other person was doing it so it did not seem like such a big deal. But Daniel who knew his God, understood the gravity of the decision that he was going to make and it was this decision that he made that made him the Excellent Daniel that we know of today.

3. The right decision may not be the sweetest decision and not everything that looks like an opportunity is good. Let us use the example of Joseph in the Bible and put his story into perspective. So Potiphar’s wife (his oga’s wife) was literally begging Joseph to sleep with her not just once or twice this means that Joseph had the chance to receive “extra benefit” in addition to the favour he had received from Potiphar. But instead he refused time and time again. At this point some people who have told him that he was not wise and cannot make use of opportunities. But if Joseph had held on to such an opportunity he may have ended up enjoying the benefits for a short while and maybe be killed or put in jail by Potiphar when he finds out that is if his madam still liked him till then and he would have never become the second most powerful man in Egypt.

4. There are persons attached to your life and your decisions. And so you have to bear in mind that you are not the only one affected by your decision. And by this I mean that there are people there are people that God has put under you whether you know them or not, and the decisions you make affects them. Let is looks at Esther’s story. At a point Esther had to make a tough decision, she had to choose between the possibility of getting killed by entering the king *something without permission or just keeping quiet and hoping that the storm will pass over and she will be unaffected. The truth is that many of us will find ourselves in a similar situation as Esther where you will have to choose between choosing the right thing to do and keeping quiet and in that moment it will feel easier to just stay quiet. But the truth is that God has put us in whatever position we find ourselves for a reason. Thank God for Mordecai who remind her of the reason why God put her in that place and the fact that the lives of the Israelites were in her hands. It is reassuring to know that God always puts a Mordecai around us and what we need to do is to be able to be sensitive to listen and obey. So imagine what would have happened to the people of Israel if Esther had chosen to remain quiet. God would have saved His people through another means but Esther would have become purposeless and how sad would it be to render yourself useless to God.

5. God gives us pointers. You are never alone when you have to make a decision. God is more interested in seeing you make the right choice than you can imagine, Isaiah 30:21 says ‘Your ears shall hear a word behind you, saying, “This is the way, walk in it,” Whenever you turn to the right hand Or whenever you turn to the left.’

 At the end of the day you are presented with different choices and you would eventually have to make a choice. Making several wrong choices is like running in the wrong direction, the faster and farther you go, the harder it is to go back, but do not be discouraged because God is a merciful God that always brings an opportunity to turn to him at every cross road.